Member-only story
Santa’s Scary Email
Friday 12/20/2019 9:35 AM
From: Jasper Mason <Jasp.FixitElf@Northpole.com>
To: Santa <Kringle.HoHoHo@Northpole.com>
Subject: Sleigh Issues
Hey Santa,
I have good news and bad news about the sleigh. After consulting with some of the other elves, I decided you should know the current situation and how we got to this point.
In a nutshell, here’s what happened:
One evening last October, Comet complained that he’s been feeling sluggish the past few years and that he needs some help pulling the sleigh. And for Comet to overcome his ego and admit this is no small matter, believe me. You know he’s one of our fastest.
I polled the rest of the reindeer and they all agreed that the sleigh’s increasing annual load (thanks to a net increase of kids being born globally) has almost reached the breaking point, especially with all those extras you and Mrs. Claus insist on keeping on board. Think about it: aeronautical safety lights, electronic stability control system, gallon jugs of deicing fluid, automatic hot cocoa maker, bags of trail mix, toiletries, extra blankets, etc. All that stuff adds up, you know.
